All I really want it to be able to appreciate everything I have already.

But I will forever need that new sweater, that shiny object that is just out of my price range, more people at my birthday party. I will forever want to be the boy with the most cake. I'm not exactly proud of it, but I accept it.

I'm not sure what the point of any of this is anymore. I write things and they never turn out like I want. Perhaps I should stop trying.